Protecting Our Monsters

Protecting Our Monsters

 

Trick or Treating is a fun thing that every kid wants to be able to do. But what about kids with special needs? The kid who is diabetic, or autistic, or has food allergies. What about these kids? Halloween trick or treating can become more stressful for them and their parents. Kids with sensory issues have a hard time with costumes or certain textures. Some kids don’t do well in big crowds. So how do we help these kids?

Have you seen the teal pumpkin? What does it mean? Well, it means that house or person has treats that are safe for kids with special needs. Look for these houses to take your little princesses and cowboys to for goodies and things just for them.

Also, as someone handing out treats remember these kiddos and pick things like pretzels, or some other healthy alternatives, or some fun little toys or pencils. This helps cut down on the amount of sweets kids get but they still have fun getting treats and fun stuff. Also, remember some kiddos my be afraid of people in masks. Just be careful how much you scare!

To help young kids or kids who struggle with big crowds, check into see what events are available in your area. Many places do a “trunk or treat.” What is “trunk or treat?” Well, cars line up in a parking lot and the kids and go around the parking lot to collect goodies from people who have been screened and approved by the organization who is hosting. This is also a place where you can go inside and get warm and probably find a snack and a rest room.

To the generous people handing out goodies to our little costumed friends please be aware that not all kids speak well or are able to communicate as “normal” kids. They aren’t being rude it is just who they are. Please to do not take offence and not treat because of this. Kids are kids and they just want to have fun.

General safety rules of course are wear bright clothes, so you can be seen. Hold hands and walk together in busy places. Do not trick or treat alone, make sure you have an adult with you. Go to houses you know. Have an adult check your treats to make sure they are safe before eating them.

Be aware of extra police helping to keep kiddos safe as they walk around town. And if you’re lucky maybe that officer has candy too! Help keep those cute little monsters safe, when driving watch for little ones who may try to sneak between cars or out of the grip of an adult. Be patient with kids as they are kids and are excited, so they may not be watching for you.

The bottom line, have fun, and be safe so all of those cute costumed kiddos come home safe!

Hurting Kids Hurt People

Hurting Kids Hurt People

 

Many people ask me as a counselor how do I help my hurting kid? Parents and caregivers can see their child is hurting. This a problem that isn’t always easy to solve. You see, it is because some hurts are so big. It isn’t like a scrapped knee that gets a band aid and a kiss. I wish it was that simple. Believe me as I see kids sit across from me in tears because they can’t figure out why their parent doesn’t come home or why someone who loves them so much would purposely hurt them.

Children naturally think that anything that happens is because of something they did. For example, if mom and dad split up kids think that if they would have behaved better or gotten better grades their parents wouldn’t have split up. When in reality the parents split up for very adult reasons. This is how I explain it to my client kids so they hopefully understand that mom and dad getting a divorce isn’t because of something they did.

When kids are hurting there are some very basic things parents and caregivers can do to help. One, listen. Just be available for your kids to talk and don’t judge what they are saying. Two, provide consistency. Don’t let kids do naughty things and let them get away with it because “they are having a hard time.” Three, allow your child to be angry or sad. God wired us to have those feelings. It is okay to have them and express them. I tell the kids I work with that it is okay to be angry, but to not do naughty things in their anger. Lastly, find our child a qualified mental health professional who specializes in working with children to help. Look for a child therapist who knows and understands children and trauma.

When working with kids who are hurting things can come up like depression, anxiety, stress, anger, acting out, as well as others. One way to support your child at home is to offer a “safe space.” This may be their room or some other place where they can get a way and just chill out. Also, provide some kind of “cool down kits.” Things in these kits could be activities that are quiet and calming to your child. Some sound cancelling headphones, coloring book and crayons, puzzles, books, music, or a journal just to list a few.

In cases where children or teens have made comments that they don’t want to be around or want to hurt themselves, PLEASE get help! This is not a game! Even if you think your child wouldn’t do anything, do you want to be wrong? Also, make sure to lock up all meds and sharp objects to keep them safe. Make a safety plan with them and their therapist. Do not be afraid to reach out for help so your child or teen can hopefully get the proper help they need and deserve.